Single Mom, An Invitation to Lean In and Trust God with Your Heart

Trusting God with your heart…

Enlarge the place of your tent, and let them stretch out the curtains of your dwellings; Do not spare; lengthen your cords, and strengthen your stakes. For you shall expand to the right and to the left, and your descendants will inherit the nations, and make the desolate cities inhabited.

Do not fear, for you will not be ashamed; neither be disgraced for you will not be put to shame. For you will forget the shame of your youth, and will not remember the reproach of your widowhood anymore. For your Maker is your husband, the Lord of hosts is His name; and your redeemer is the Holy one of Israel; He is called the God of the whole earth. For the Lord has called you like a woman forsaken and grieved in spirit, like a youthful wife when you were refused.”
Isaiah 54: 2-6

Get ready mamma. He’s not done with you yet.

He’s inviting you with a glorious invitation. Allow your capacity to be stretched. Get used to the idea of living outside your comfort zone. When it comes to the things of God? Don’t hold back. Allow Him to expand you – trusting him with your life, your influence, your heart. It’s safe with Him. Establish yourself in Him. Stay firm in Him. When you’re unsure and worried, go to Him. He has the answers and the healing your heart is begging for.

And those beautiful kids of yours?

He’s got them too. He sees your late-night worries about their faith and their choices and behavior. He hears your prayers to protect their hearts from the devastation caused by family breakdown. He gets it. And He’s not watching from afar – He’s right there in the mess when there are tears and loud words and frustrations and fears. He’s sitting by your bed when you cry yourself to sleep, wondering what their future looks like – and coming to terms with the fact that it isn’t going to look anything like what you’d imagined for them.

He’s got them, momma.

Place them in His hands and you’ll see the miracles unfold. Maybe now, maybe later. But unfold they will. He has promised – just like in those ancient stories – that your descendants would inherit the nations – that they’d inhabit those desolate places. You know what that means? He’ll turn their pain into beauty. He’ll enlarge their capacity. And He won’t hold back. Entrust your children to God, momma. That’s the very safest place for them to be.

Those ‘should’ves’, ‘could’ves’, ‘would’ves’? Leave them be. Seasons change, time passes. Whatever was, has been and gone and there’s new hope, new healing, new life building within you. And whenever that quiet voice – or the loud one – speaks to you of shame and disappointment and ‘why couldn’t you be better?’, throw them at the foot of the cross, momma. He didn’t go all the way to calvary, because of the ‘perfect’ ones. He went for us. The broken and busted. The ones who He knew wouldn’t be able to carry the pain of the world alone.

He went for us.

He went for you.

He’s not afraid of your brokenness. Not awkward about the fact that everything fell apart or that you’re single or whatever status fits right now.

Cos you know what?

This right here?

It’s His specialty.

The light of Jesus’ love shines bright in messiness surrendered to Him. A healthy, whole husband is committed. He cares and loves and gives of himself. His priorities are straight and secure and he is servant to God, first and foremost.

And that’s who God is to you now. God Himself – maker of Heaven and Earth. He now offers Himself to you as husband. Because He knows how hard this journey is alone. He has created us to be in union. To parent as a team. To live as part of a loving and intimate relationship. And when that breaks and falls – as it sometimes does – He steps in and says, ‘I love you more than I can even say. Please, let me walk this with you.’ He says it with a smile, but I’m pretty sure there are tears in His eyes too.

He knows the pain under the surface.

He’s no stranger to this. It was thousands of years ago that the words of Isaiah were scribbled on parchment and began being passed from generation to generation. But even back then, He made sure to include those of us who are alone through the end of a marriage. He made sure to comfort us with these words.

Because whether we are alone through the death of a spouse, or through the breakdown of a relationship, there’s been a death and there’s grief and mess and a great chasm – and He’s there.

That sting of rejection?

The empty feeling of abandonment?

Thousands of years ago He wrote it in His Holy Book. He wanted to make sure we knew that He understands. He knows these pains and longings. And His whole being cries to heal and hold and with that beautiful Holy love, walking alongside us throughout.

Surrender it to Him, momma.

The whole story of the Bible, from right back in the beginning when He created the Heavens and the Earth. It’s built around the fact that He knows our pain and He begs us to let Him in. Whether it seems too bad, too ugly and too unholy – or just too painful to acknowledge – He is standing by, ready to take your hand and walk with you as you take those small steps.

Steps toward healing, wholeness, and hope. It’s a decision you’ll never regret momma. Calvary is proof.

Joni lives just outside Sydney in the beautiful Hawkesbury region with her three children and their poodle, Ellie. Having journeyed through depression, marriage breakdown and some of the other curve balls life can throw, she is passionate about cheering others on and encouraging them to embrace themselves and their story. She is terrible at telling jokes and regularly comes down with foot-in-mouth disease while blushing profusely. Joni writes about her journey as a single mom on Instagram at @singlemumsthriving.